TGIF

its 5am and i havent slept nang mahusay... i just know something's missing in my life and im not quite alright. started talking to my friend from Manila and told him im sad. he tried to cheer me up by sending me an emoticon of a dancing rat. hehe. its silly but somehow made me smile. then while talking to him, i realized how much i miss being with people who knows me best, how much i miss being home, in our house with my parents especially my mom. i was watching tv kanina until 1am, and i recall watching late night tv shows with my mom and dad as the three of us try to fall asleep. tabi-tabi kami sa sala, we prefer to sleep there than in our rooms dahil mas presko ang hangin. usually, my mom would be in the middle tapos kami ng tatay ko sa gilid. we would turn on the sleep setting of the tv, para it will automatically shutdown when we're all finally asleep. usually, im the last to fall asleep, nauuna pa nga yung tv mag-shutdown and all channels would start signing-off.

hay, grabe...i just want to be home kahit sandali lang... kahit one hour lang. im wishing tuloy, sana i have sabrina's magical power to transport herself to different places. ill take myself back to that old familiar place with both the two people i love most in life.

naiinis ako when i think about it...feeling ko kasi we should be allowed to fly back home kahit once lang. my friends say that its in the policies, pero i am not granted that privilege due to budget concerns. kaso ang masakit, my managers here are going to Manila for two weeks this month... maiiwan ako... naiinis ako, pero what can i do... even if i ask, hindi naman iga-grant for sure. dapat hindi ko na lang isipin, di ba... sasama lang loob ko if i think about it. isipin ko na lang na at least pwede akong makapagpadala ng stuff sa kanila... pero kahit na, kapos pa rin... ahhck.

so tonight, or today, because it's 530am... ang theme song ng buhay ko ay:

somewhere out there

beneath the pale moon light

someone's thinking of me

and loving me tonight

hehe...korni no? anyway, ganon talaga. accept the things we cannot change and focus on what blessings we have. at least i know nam-miss rin ako ng nanay at tatay ko back home and that we are looking at the same set of skies and stars, im just seeing them from the other side of the world. kaya for now, i should be content and try to get back to bed and get some good rest. napuyat na ako ng husto. oa. buti na lang friday na.